Rating Video Game Birds I Would (And Wouldn’t) Eat For Thanksgiving Dinner [Game Informer]
Ah, Thanksgiving. It's a time of year for gratitude, togetherness, repeatedly attempting to explain my job to older relatives, and most importantly, a time when a lot of people come together to eat one really big bird. But here's the thing. Why do we always eat the same kind of bird? I mean, turkey is fine and all, but why not branch out a bit? Why not chicken, or quail, or pheasant?
And that got me thinking – why limit my daydreaming to real-life birds when there’s so much delicious-looking poultry in video games? Sure, not every video game bird would be tasty, but it’s worth assessing in case I ever get Jumanji-ed into a game one day.
Here’s my rating of video game birds based on how good they’d be for Thanksgiving dinner.
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<div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden gi5-field-image gi5-image field__item"> <img loading="lazy" src="https://www.gameinformer.com/sites/default/files/styles/thumbnail/public/2023/11/21/b8c89440/kazooie.jpg" width="800" height="450" alt="" typeof="Image" class="image-style-thumbnail"></div>
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<div class="field field--name-field-list-item-title field--type-string field--label-hidden gi5-field-list-item-title gi5-string field__item">Kazooie (4/10)</div>
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<div class="field field--name-field-list-item-sub field--type-string field--label-hidden gi5-field-list-item-sub gi5-string field__item">from Banjo Kazooie</div>
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<div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-copy field--type-text-long field--label-hidden gi5-field-copy gi5-text-long field__item">Kazooie doesn't look actively gross, but she doesn't have that much meat on her to begin with. She also has way too much personality for me to feel good about eating her. I'm not saying there are no interesting birds in the real world, but I don't think any are as expressive as Kazooie.
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<div class="field field--name-field-image field--type-image field--label-hidden gi5-field-image gi5-image field__item"> <img loading="lazy" src="https://www.gameinformer.com/sites/default/files/styles/thumbnail/public/2023/11/21/91d3b260/unfezant.jpg" width="800" height="450" alt="" typeof="Image" class="image-style-thumbnail"></div>
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<div class="field field--name-field-list-item-title field--type-string field--label-hidden gi5-field-list-item-title gi5-string field__item">Unfezant (9/10)</div>
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<div class="field field--name-field-list-item-sub field--type-string field--label-hidden gi5-field-list-item-sub gi5-string field__item">from Pokémon</div>
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<div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-field-copy field--type-text-long field--label-hidden gi5-field-copy gi5-text-long field__item">The average ring-necked pheasant is 2.6 pounds. That's a lot of food, but Unfezant weighs a whopping 63.9 pounds! That is massive, easily feeding three times the number of people as a typical Thanksgiving turkey. The only downside here is raising a Pidove or Tranquil enough levels to evolve, but once the larger Pokémon world accepts Thanksgiving as the norm, I'm sure farmers will be raising plenty in pastures.